Treat to 'ME'

After a long time i want to write just for myself.
A beautiful long journey which i have undertaken, not sure what way this is heading towards.
Today as I look back, everything seems to be so different and so changed.
Now , I can see a young girl on a mission to accept the whole world, on a mission to love everyone and hate no one. Stupid it does sound but Oh! the girl loves it all.

I know I have flaws. I know my ways are often wrong. All I wanted was hapiness all around, all I got was confusion all around. Every road I travel has its own huge speed breakers, some i'am able to see but at the rest I also stumble.
My path is not a bed of roses, but I love it this way. I love the way things come to me....
Flashback takes me to my childhood. A naughty me upto something. Teenager was even worse. Years pass by and today the story remains unchanged and the turmoil within me remains the same.....
Something I'am not able to define, something that still remain unanswered -
> Why do I want a bloom in the desert?
> Why do I see light even when it is darkness all around?
> Why is there no limit to my being concerned about everyone I come in contact with.
> Why the hell can I not kiss my people before I, Go, kiss the world.

Escaped..

She closed her eyes to take that jump into the pool of meditation. It was her addiction that not only comforted her, but also took her to the valley of strangers where she had no expectations. That was always pleasant. But on the other hand, her thoughts caged her with the fear of loss. Certainty could come and jolt her anytime. The wing of ideation always took her to the flight of dreams. If you build a castle out of sand, would you rather let the waves destroy it or do that on your own? She did ponder upon. Yet the waves became a friend that she entrusted, not herself.
She did want to capture those waves in her words, but their lucidity always escaped her ink.